Anal sex. Taboo, hot, messy, scary, gross? It’s the mythical beast of sex – you know people do it, but you’re not quite sure how to prep for anal sex properly or even where to start. Or maybe you’ve been doing butt stuff for a while and want to up your game.
I spoke to Lenina Crowne, statuesque British beauty, porn star, and anal lover, to get her advice and go deep on prep for anal sex and what makes her pussy “like literally foaming”.
“When you’re watching an anal scene with all the lube and the gape gloves, and the massive cock, it’s like, the most amazing thing ever. There is something so filthy about it and I just love that.”
Why you should know how to prep for anal sex
Anal intercourse isn’t about going down the wrong hole. Trying to just slip it in without preparation or lots of lube, aside from your penis being choked out in not a good way, will make your partner feel like they’ve been stabbed in the asshole and is sure-fire to get anal tears or fissures.
Not to mention the golden rule of NO DOUBLE DIPPING due to the risk of infection – which we’ll go into further down. Unlike a vagina, the anus isn’t self-lubricating and isn’t evolved to have things be inserted.
The good news is that like any muscle it can be trained, and anal penetration can be really safe, fun and pleasurable with the right amount of preparation.
“When I used anal toys, I really, really enjoyed it.”said Lenina Crown. “And occasionally when I had anal sex with a guy, I would also enjoy it, but it would never feel amazing. I realize now that was because I wasn’t properly prepared.”
However, prep for anal sex isn’t just physical, it’s also psychological. Fear of mess and pain are both things that will make an asshole clamp up tighter than a clam.
Feeling psychologically safe and relaxed is paramount to good anal. Not only will you be able to slide in smoother and easier, but it will be more pleasurable for the receiver all around. Because when anal play is good – it’s fucking great.
Good communication, anal training and stretching, cleaning, and anal lube (usually silicone-based lube) are key parts of preparation that can help you and your partner feel relaxed and ready for anal play. So, where to begin?
Start with some anal stretching
“I thought ‘these girls are incredible with their elastic buttholes, I really want to be like that.’ So when the new year came around my resolution was to buy an anal stretching kit.”
Butt plugs, anal beads, stretching kits… toys are a great way to prepare for anal sex by introducing anal play to build up to taking a full penis or dildo.
For the person receiving anal, starting with using a small butt plug or some anal fingering while they’re masturbating will help them associate anal play with pleasure and orgasm and can help get them psychologically ready for anal sex with a partner.
So whether the aim is to fit a small dildo up there, or your partner wants to become agaping queen or king. With regular anal training, like any muscle, the anus will be able to take more and more.
You can support your partner by allowing them to build up to take different sizes in their own time, or even train together by incorporating butt plugs into sex.
Lenina took us through her anal stretching journey
“My kit has five anal stretchers in it. The first one was very small, so I started with the second one which felt ok. A few days later, I put the third one in and thought it was at my limit, so I used that for about a week. Then I tried the fourth one.”
The stretching part of Lenina’s prep for anal sex was quite fast: “This all happened over a period of about a month. The goal was just to be able to put dildos up there. Which I surprisingly managed to do within like two weeks. And it felt really good.”
\”When it happened I had like this wide-eyed moment, like ‘oh my god this feels amazing.’”
How to prep for anal sex – anal douching
“If I’m clean, then I don’t need warming up at all. I don’t need to use a dildo first. I don’t need to use stretchers first. It literally just goes in.”
Shit happens. To the best of us, and if you’re going to go down the rabbit hole you’ve got to be prepared to pull out a couple of rabbits. Although this is totally natural, the fear of mess is one thing that can psychologically make anal intercourse really difficult to receive.
Lenina took us through the do’s and don’ts of anal douching. “One of the most important things is the cleaning of the ass. Because when you’re empty, it feels much better.”
”The very first thing is to get a good douching kit that you feel comfortable with. I use one of those shower-heads that just screws on, but I know some other girls prefer to use a hand-pumped douche.”
“There are basically two types of cleaning you can do to prep for anal sex. The first type of cleaning, is a quick emptying of the rectum that takes 15 – 20 minutes. This one is good for general anal. You can also do a very deep intestinal cleaning, which can take up to an hour and a half.”
“I put warm water in my butt, wait until the water comes out and repeat until it comes out clean. Once that’s done I use a small anal toy to make sure that there’s no water up there, because it won’t all come out straight away. I’ll put the toy up there, shake it around and pull it out and any stuck water will come out with it.”
Don’t over clean
Lenina warns against being too enthusiastic with the water so you don’t accidentally give yourself an enema: “I learned through trial and error that there’s a very limited amount of cleaning that you should do.”
“The first time I used my douche attachment, I got a bit carried away and accidentally started doing the deep clean because I was having fun with it and I, unfortunately, ended up with some like intestinal mucus coming out.”
”It’s apparently completely normal. But it obviously took a long time and I ended up with a lot of warm water stuck in my intestines which made me feel quite bloated and ill. So now I only ever do the simple rectum cleaning.”
Lenina tells me that prep for anal sex is not a glamorous procedure by any means: “You know, you’re basically paddling in your own fecal matter.”
“You don’t want to be cleaning every day, because that could mess with your bodies biome and good bacteria. But a couple of times a week won’t hurt.”
On top of cleaning before anal, another important part of cleanliness is the NO DOUBLE DIPPING rule, to prevent urinary tract infections which could put your partner out of action for weeks.
Even after cleaning, there will still be bacteria in the anus. This means that if you put anything in the anus, you should clean it or put a new condom on it before putting it in the vagina – this goes for toys, fingers and dicks.
How to have anal sex like a pro
Now, you know how to prep for anal sex you are ready to do the deed. Your partner is stretched, cleaned and comfortable, it’s time to lube the hell up. Get your hands on some anal sex lube, specific for anal play.
These are slightly more viscous and last longer, some also have muscle-relaxing properties. Lenina also recommends coconut oil. However, be careful because coconut oil can cause condoms to break.
“I’ve been using coconut oil recently, which I actually really like. I’m always paranoid, even after I’ve cleaned, that my arse is going to smell. But coconut oil smells so strongly of coconut that it doesn’t matter.”
Start slow. Lenina warns “Don’t start hammering away if you haven’t done that before or warmed up. You can build up to a pace that you might have with vaginal, but it takes time.”
Allow the receiver to set the pace – you’ll know she’s enjoying it when she starts thrusting back on you more and more.
“The clitoris is actually extended like eight inches under the skin. What you see of the clitoris is just a tiny part. When you have anal sex, it can stimulate that as well as your G-spot so it makes my pussy like, literally like foaming. It’s honestly, some of the most amazing sensations I’ve ever felt.”
Some good anal sex positions to start with are your classic doggy style, with the receiver on all fours or laying on their stomach with their butt in the air which allows for easy access. Plus they can easily push back into you if they want more.
Missionary is also great for anal pleasure. You get that face to face intimacy, plus your partner can rub their clitoris on your pubic bone for extra stimulation.
BTW. . .WTF are gape gloves?
What the fuck are gape gloves you’re wondering? Lenina brought them out on our call to show us and we were not disappointed.
When your asshole is properly warmed up and relaxed it can look like it is ‘gaping’ open. Sometimes Lenina likes to capture photos of her gape.
However, as Lenina explains. “If you’re holding your arse open, there’s so much lube that you won’t have any grip. So now I have a pair of ‘I Heart Gape’ gloves. And I am very excited to start using these.”
Gape gloves might not be part of everyone’s prep for anal sex but if you’re going to go full porno and take pics of your partner’s gape then they might be essential.
Go forth and fuck
Anal is meant to be pleasurable. If your partner is finding it too painful or impossible, give them more time to get used to it.
With patience and preparation through stretching, cleaning and plenty of lube you’ll be doing anal like a pornstar, rather than trying to batter down a drawbridge that won’t open. Thanks Lenina.